North Romford vs Ascot United - 25/09/2005

NRFC maintained their 100% record with this convincing 2-0 victory over dogged opponents on Sunday.
Goals;
Marky P, Bosh


It was felt that playing on the show pitch was putting too much pressure on the lads, so a change of plan was adopted with the game being played on one of the training pitches. With no Eric the Turk, and Sid the Greek only on the line, Timid decided to start with the same side that finished the week before, meaning a first start for Nev's mate Jason. Unfortunately, he was forced to cry off with a bad back, leaving the door open for the veteran Hollamby to reclaim the fullback slot. As he had brought the super yellow kit, it was only right that he should start!

NRFC started brightly, knocking the ball around with some panache. Although there was no end product you could see the confidence oozing from the pores of the players, other than Clifton, who was as pissed as a fart!!
Ascot began to get into the game as the first half wore on, and went closest when the buccaneering centre forward beat Spicy for pace, only to be thwarted by the legs of the Big Man between the sticks. Surely he is the best English keeper outside the Premiership!!
This acted as a wake up call for the yellow and blues, and they began to press again, with Wadsy adopting a Scholes-like personality and breaking late into the box. JJ went close with a header from Wadsy's corner, having nearly broken his ankle taking the corner before! It is never advisable to kick thefloor first..
Other than a couple of half-hearted shouts for penalties, when the Ascot back-four decided to be the Harlem Globetrotters, the first half ended goalless.

Proving themselves a second half team, the NRFC boys came out blazing and took the lead after 2 minutes of the 2nd half. Smiler sublimely intercepted a through ball on his chest, and set up the move of the game. It was moved through Wadsy to Nev, whose burst into the box was Keane-like in its motion. He picked out Parmenter, who side stepped the lumbering centre half with aplomb and slotted into the corner.
The game meandered for 25 minutes with NRFC looking in no trouble until Smiler tried to usher the ball back to Brownie, only for the centre forwardto nudge him off. Get on the weights Curran!!
Luckily the Big Man was there to snuff out the shot, you could see how much the clean sheet meant to him. It was then that Wadsy damaged his knee and was pushed up front. What a tactical change. The boy was everywhere, rampaging down both flanks, and testing the keeper with a left foot thunderbolt. He should have scored with 5 to go when he was put clean through by Marky P, but he passed it back to the keeper. From the resulting throw out Marky P was presented with an open goal, which he managed to boot towards the fire station. His defence? He wanted them to have to walk a long way to get the ball back!! He then hit the bar with a right foot volley, and the bar is still shuddering today!!
There was still time for Nev to get absolutely battered by a kid of about 7, and the whining that emanated from the skipper suggested a serious injury. Luckily, he is just a weed, who had been winded!! It was only a matter of time before the second goal arrived, and it was duly delivered by Gav at the far post from a ludicrous Wadsy long throw. There were rumours amongst the crowd that Gav was trying to miss, but these are unfounded! Overall, a very pleasing outcome with Timid being touted as the next England manager already.
TIMID FOR ENGLAND! TIMID FOR ENGLAND!

Team: Big Man, Veteran, Cordelli, Spicy (Nev's mate Jason), Smiler, Student,Ace, Bugs, Waddy, Dangerous, Rossell (Nev's mate Jason's brother Simeon).
report by Kevin Parmenter